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Thursday, July 15, 2010

Settlement

It's a magnificent Summer evening a year from now and four bankers are posturing on a porch in Southampton. They first start to talk about their children's success, charitable giving, home renovations and vacations. But after a while things start to heat up as the testosterone starts to flow. Then its the size of the jet, then their biggest deals and finally how each one escaped near disaster using guile, connections and quick thinking.

They all know that even Bill Gates had to publicly eat gravel for five years in his antitrust investigation waiting for Bush II to finally get him off the hook and that even Warren Buffet was caught on his derivative deals with AIG which miraculously turned each one of them from being the world's two stingiest men in to the world's most generous.

After all what do prosecutors have to live for except beating down entitled, self indulgent, money hoarding billionaires and turning them into philanthropists? And if they have a rich daddy - maybe a hooker or two or three or four.

So back to our porch with the great beach views - finally all eyes turn to the Goldman partner to tell his story of his escape. But he has to say nothing. All his competitors are going to "get" is a brief self satisfied smirk. No more Bear Sterns, Lehman, Merill and a toothless Morgan Stanley and the cost - $1,000,000,000 to settle with a resource strapped US Attorney's office who cant persuade any good lawyers like Boies to help them.

Well, we really only needed one investment bank anyway!!!!!

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